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About States of Mind

“He looked like he was in a right old state”

“She worked herself up into a dreadful state”

Have you ever heard this kind of statement, or made similar comments about people you spend time with? We often speak of people as being in ‘a state’, and it’s not unusual for the connotations to be somewhat negative, implying that there is a loss of control or an extreme emotional response in their behaviour.

You are always in a ‘State’

How often in the course of our daily lives, do we really think about or notice the states of mind we are in, and the influence they might be having on levels of happiness, performance or energy? Most people rarely stop to think about it—but it’s true that:

your ‘State’ is one of the most important factors

in living the life you really want to live

And yes, you are always in a state of one kind or another, even when you are asleep! Since that is the case, then doesn’t it make sense to choose states that support you better in what you want to be, do and have in your life? To be in more control of your responses and to have a personal inner space where you can develop your self-awareness?

What kind of State are YOU in right now?

As you read these words, you can become aware of how you experience yourself right now — are you feeling positive, relaxed, with an inner sense of worth?

· Do you have a sense of your self as able to fulfil your potential?

· How are you speaking to yourself?

· Is your inner voice being kind to you?

· Do you feel confident, powerful, joyful — able to deal with whatever comes along in your life?

If the answer is YES—then you’re in a resourceful state. Or maybe...

· Do you suffer from doubts about yourself, which limit your ability to progress?

· Is your inner voice critical of you?

· Are your relationships, your career, your social and family life or your education suffering because you don’t give yourself permission to be at your best?

Learning to create and access a personal resourceful state can be an empowering experience which leads to growth and development. Having the benefit of such a strategy can help you to manage the more challenging times in your life without overwhelm. Being able to access a resourceful state won’t miraculously ‘fix’ the tough bits—often it’s those parts of our lives from which we learn most. But it might just help to provide a little steady comfort when things are difficult, and enable us to benefit even more when life is going well.

Change Your State Right Now

There are two main ways to change your state—FOCUS & PHYSIOLOGY.

So change physiology by pretending there’s piece of string attached to the top of your head and hold on to it whilst you stretch the string upwards and your upper body becomes more upright. Then change your focus:

When I was initially introduced to “state management” as part of a personal growth and development course, I was asked to get myself into a focused state for learning, and I found I had a little trouble. There was something blocking me, and I couldn’t stay in the focused state my course tutor was demonstrating.

I took a little time out and asked myself some questions – like why I was having difficulties, what was behind them and how I could overcome them. The following morning, I woke up mentally hearing my mother’s voice saying very plainly: “Don’t get yourself into such a state, dear”, just as she used to do when I was feeling upset or angry about something that was happening in my life.

I realised then that I had been resisting “getting myself into a state” because my mother had advised me against it in my formative years! So I gave myself permission to get into a state, and from then on was able to learn more about taking charge of my responses and developing self awareness.